What's the worst that could happen?
What's the worst that could happen?
I love that phrase. In my experience, nobody uses that phrase unless they think they have all their bases covered. I think it is synonymous with the "pride comes before the fall." As many people know, my last day of employment with PricewaterhouseCoopers will be this Friday. I am excited about my new job and am finding it hard to concentrate or even care about what I am doing at PwC. As I was talking with one of my managers, they used the phrase I opened with. That started me thinking (a momentous occasion if there ever was one) about what IS the worst that could happen? Here are a few situations I came up with and what I see as the worst that could happen.
Situation 1:
You are on an African Safari and spilled some of your steak sandwich in your shirt without realizing it. What's the worst that could happen? As I see it, the worst that could happen isn't that you would be attacked and eaten by Lions, Hyenas, or other wildlife. That would be the best. After all, you didn't take me on the safari. The only way that would be the worst, is if I was also there. Then I would feel bad for you. And even being eaten on a safari isn't the worst. If you died, then you are done suffering. No, the worst would be if the lion or some other creature ate your nose. Not only would you look funny, but you could never wake-up and smell the roses, cut-off your nose to spite your face, and the worst part is you could never sneeze properly again. Think about it. If you sneezed hard enough, you might find your brain in your hanky.
Situation 2:
You are on your way to see your family, but run out of gas on the side of the freeway in a city known for its high amount of crime. What is the worst that could happen? This one is easy. You could accept a ride from a couple of aliens. Everybody knows that Albuquerque has a high crime rate and alien abductions are pretty high with Roswell, NM so close. The only thing I really need to say as to why this is the worst, has to do with the slap of rubber gloves and those alien abduction rumors.
Situation 3:
You are on a deserted island with another person and there is only one coconut. Yes, there are sandy beaches and the beautiful ocean, but the person you are stuck with is of the same gender as you. What is the worst that could happen? Well, the two of you decide to make the most of your time on the island and share the milk, but he/she refuses to wear the coconut bikini you made out of the two haves of the shell. This is the worst, because now you won't be able to see the after dinner show. (You are the show)
Situation 4:
You are dreaming that you are giving a speech in front of your church, office, etc and realize that you are naked. Not only that, but you dream that you are falling off a cliff at the same time. What is the worst that could happen? Just before you hit the ground, you forget what you were going to say in closing, thereby ruining what could have been a great speech, and also realize that you aren't really dreaming.
Situation 5:
You are reading a blog in the hope that it will lead you to a deeper and more meaningful life. What's the worst that could happen? You realize that the thoughts and ideas expressed in this blog ARE the deepest and most meaningful thoughts of your life and that you are better because of this reading.
I find it a bit ironic that when I run the spell-checker provided with this blog service, the word blog is not in the dictionary.
Live long and prosper,
Dan Smith (a.k.a. The deep end of the gene pool)
I love that phrase. In my experience, nobody uses that phrase unless they think they have all their bases covered. I think it is synonymous with the "pride comes before the fall." As many people know, my last day of employment with PricewaterhouseCoopers will be this Friday. I am excited about my new job and am finding it hard to concentrate or even care about what I am doing at PwC. As I was talking with one of my managers, they used the phrase I opened with. That started me thinking (a momentous occasion if there ever was one) about what IS the worst that could happen? Here are a few situations I came up with and what I see as the worst that could happen.
Situation 1:
You are on an African Safari and spilled some of your steak sandwich in your shirt without realizing it. What's the worst that could happen? As I see it, the worst that could happen isn't that you would be attacked and eaten by Lions, Hyenas, or other wildlife. That would be the best. After all, you didn't take me on the safari. The only way that would be the worst, is if I was also there. Then I would feel bad for you. And even being eaten on a safari isn't the worst. If you died, then you are done suffering. No, the worst would be if the lion or some other creature ate your nose. Not only would you look funny, but you could never wake-up and smell the roses, cut-off your nose to spite your face, and the worst part is you could never sneeze properly again. Think about it. If you sneezed hard enough, you might find your brain in your hanky.
Situation 2:
You are on your way to see your family, but run out of gas on the side of the freeway in a city known for its high amount of crime. What is the worst that could happen? This one is easy. You could accept a ride from a couple of aliens. Everybody knows that Albuquerque has a high crime rate and alien abductions are pretty high with Roswell, NM so close. The only thing I really need to say as to why this is the worst, has to do with the slap of rubber gloves and those alien abduction rumors.
Situation 3:
You are on a deserted island with another person and there is only one coconut. Yes, there are sandy beaches and the beautiful ocean, but the person you are stuck with is of the same gender as you. What is the worst that could happen? Well, the two of you decide to make the most of your time on the island and share the milk, but he/she refuses to wear the coconut bikini you made out of the two haves of the shell. This is the worst, because now you won't be able to see the after dinner show. (You are the show)
Situation 4:
You are dreaming that you are giving a speech in front of your church, office, etc and realize that you are naked. Not only that, but you dream that you are falling off a cliff at the same time. What is the worst that could happen? Just before you hit the ground, you forget what you were going to say in closing, thereby ruining what could have been a great speech, and also realize that you aren't really dreaming.
Situation 5:
You are reading a blog in the hope that it will lead you to a deeper and more meaningful life. What's the worst that could happen? You realize that the thoughts and ideas expressed in this blog ARE the deepest and most meaningful thoughts of your life and that you are better because of this reading.
I find it a bit ironic that when I run the spell-checker provided with this blog service, the word blog is not in the dictionary.
Live long and prosper,
Dan Smith (a.k.a. The deep end of the gene pool)
posted by futboldan at 2:38 PM
1 Comments:
The worst that could happen is that the only thing on your to-do list for that day is to read your husbands blog. And then you sigh at the sadness of your life.
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